Consolation

I am having a very hard time tonight. I am so sad about all that Lydia went through those last 2-3 months, and I cannot get the details of it all out of my thoughts. I go over and over it in my mind and my heart breaks.

Charlie and I went to the funeral of a dear friend’s daughter this week. This daughter, in her mid 40s, died suddenly of heart attack on Christmas Eve. The mother of this daughter is a close friend of mine. As I held this friend while she sobbed uncontrollable, I wondered at the difference in the natures of our grief. I had lost my child after watching her suffer loss after loss over many months; the last months being unbearably heart breaking. Her child was gone quickly, with no warning. My friend’s grief is intense, all-consuming; she is inconsolable. Mine has gnawed relentlessly, quietly in my heart for months. I had time to prepare though, to consider what my life would be, who I would be, when Lydia passed away. I made myself consider her death, her burial, and yes, her new life in heaven. I am so lonely for her, but the hard part for me now is remembering what that brain tumor did to my beautiful, beautiful girl.

This friend lives down the road from me. It is no coincidence that two of us here on this little hill have lost our daughters within two weeks of one another, is it? Help us, Lord, as we console one another.

Merry Christmas, Lydia

It is our first Christmas without Lydia. As our family gathered, we lit a candle for her to represent our love for her and all our memories of her, as well as to acknowledge our grief and deep sorrow that she is gone.

Has it only been two weeks since she left us? It feels like years. I want so much to see her smile, to hear her laugh, to hold her close to me until she fusses, “Enough, Mom, let me go!”

It hurts so much to let her go.

Obituary

Lydia Ruth Sappington, 27, died Monday, Dec. 10, 2007, at Sanctuary Hospice House in Tupelo, Mississippi.

She was born July 14, 1980, in Portsmouth, New Hampshire. She was a student and a member of Liberty Baptist Church.

Services were at 11 a.m. Wednesday, Dec. 12, at United Funeral Service chapel with the Rev. Shawn Davis and the Rev. Ted "Eddie" Chandler officiating. Burial was in Liberty Cemetery, New Albany, Mississippi.

Survivors include her parents, Charles Edwin Sappington and Donna Kay Wykle Sappington of New Albany; two brothers, Charles E. "Chuck" Sappington Jr. and Danielle of Water Valley, and Jason D. Sappington of New Orleans, La.; her grandfather, Gene A. Wykle, and stepgrandmother, Sharon, of Crestview, Fla. She was preceded in death by her grandmother, Ella Mae Wykle, and her grandparents, J. E. and Vera Sappington. Pallbearers were Connie Sappington, Bobby Sappington, Thomas Sappington, Allen Wykle, Kenny Phillips and Danny Murrah.

Memorials may be made to Sanctuary Hospice House, 5159 W. Main St., Tupelo, MS 38801.

Arrangements

Lydia will be buried in Liberty Cemetery on Wednesday, with all those Sappingtons who have gone before her and who joyfully greeted her when she arrived in heaven.

Lydia was surrounded by her brothers, Chuck and Jason, and Charlie and me when she passed. She died peacefully. We were cautioned about the real possibility of very high fever with seizures at the end, but it never came to that. Her breathing just gradually became more and more shallow. In the end, she opened her eyes completely and breathed her last. I was not prepared for the gravity of that moment of transition. I could not comprehend the reality of the life and spirit passing out of the precious body before me: this infant I had nursed, this toddler, this little girl, this beautiful young woman whom I had loved with all my heart every day of her earthly life.

We are all very tired and broken but are being ministered to by our friends and loved ones. I will never forget the sacrificial love that has been shown to us.

She is healed

Our precious Lydia went to be with the Lord this morning at 2:30 am.

Special grace

Lydia is on Morphine and Atavan to ease her breathing and fever and to keep her from having seizures. She sleeps most of the time now and does not seem to be in any pain or discomfort. We sense that God has given her a special grace for this time to keep her mind quiet and free from fear as she goes through this.

I slept at home last night for the first time in 2 weeks. I do not want to leave Lydia's side, and I stay with her day and night. Charlie is with her right now. It is hard to see her this way; she has always been so quick to laugh or give you a hug.

I apologize for not posting in several days. I have not had access to the internet till just this morning, but I should be able to give an update on most days now. Thank for your caring hearts. Thank you for you prayers. Thank you for your love.

Home again

A warm fire, lovely paintings and stitchery on the walls, comfy chairs, a garden with birdfeeders and a fountain, a gazebo to sit under and ponder life, loving, caring people all around--doesn't this sound like home? It is home for Lydia for now. She is in the Sanctuary Hospice House in Tupelo. How can such a blessing be possible at a dark time like this? Lydia is comfortable and tended to by angels in this place.

I am at the library right now just looking through what has piled up on my desk this week (not much! the staff handles things so well), and Charlie is by Lydia's side. One or both of us is with her 24 hours a day, and I am headed there now. I am taking her little poodle Xander for a visit. If he behaves, we might let him stay with her all the time!

She is in Room 4 East, and you are welcome to visit. If you want to email us, there is a link under my profile. How can we possibly thank all of you for your prayers and love?

A Room for Lydia

We got the word from Sanctuary House that there is a room for Lydia now. As soon as an ambulance is ready here, we will be going there.

Lydia's Grandpa Wykle and Sharon are here with her now.